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S02E15-Watson Holmes Gregson severed ballerina This page is a transcript for the Season Two episode Corpse de Ballet

Joan Watson: More on point than a sock. Coffee? I wasn't sure how you take it.
Tatiana: Black is fine, thank you.
Watson: I'm Joan.
Tatiana: Tatiana.
Watson: Please, don't interpret the to-go cup as a sign that you need to rush off.
Sherlock Holmes: I'll have you know, Watson, that Tatiana is rushing off of her own accord. It's her morning to deliver the sermon.
Tatiana: Thank you for the coffee. And you, for last night. I'll let myself out.
Holmes: Mmm.
Watson: Sermon?
Holmes: She's a pastor of some sort.
Watson: And her last name is?
Holmes: Probably quite lovely.
Watson: So, yesterday was the archaeologist. And last week was the schoolteacher and the magician?
Holmes: Mortician, Sylvia is a mortician. The magician left on tour about a month ago. I have to say, Watson, I'm feeling a little bit judged. You're well aware that I view sex as an exercise. As do the women I entertain.
Watson: No judgment. Just buy some more to-go cups.

Stage Manager: Ms. Lanzer? Uh, Vincent is ready to start the rehearsal if you are. Good morning, Ms. Lanzer. Prima is on the move. Everybody, settle! Places, please. Columns go.
Crew: Columns go.
Iris Lanzer: What was that?

Holmes: Judging by the pack of reporters outside, either ballet is ascendant in the zeitgeist, or it's leaked that a murder has occurred here.
Captain Gregson: Half the company tweeted their regrets for the deceased before we even got here. A couple of them even mentioned that she was cut in two.
Holmes: She was one of the dancers?
Gregson: Her name was Nell Solange.
Watson: We noticed a few security cameras on the way in.
Gregson: Apparently, so did the killer. All the cameras in and around the theater feed into one hard drive in the manager's office. Unfortunately for us, the perp took it on his way out. Vincent Renatto. He's the company's ballet master. Mr. Renatto? I'd like you to meet our consultants, Mr. Sherlock Holmes and Ms. Joan Watson.
Holmes: Our condolences for your loss.
Vincent Rinatto: Thank you. I adored Nell, I...we're all reeling. I choreographed this piece with her in mind.
Holmes: She was dancing the lead?
Rinatto: Unfortunately, during auditions, she never quite connected with the role. Didn't give it her full focus. So I had to cast a more established dancer.

Holmes: Bisection. It's been a while since I've seen one of these.
Watson: You'd think there'd be more blood.
Holmes: You would. If being cut in half was what had killed her.
Watson: Her throat was slit.
Gregson: Preliminary time of death was around 10:00 last night. We think she was killed backstage, and then moved up into the rigging. Perp coiled a wire around her waist, so that in the morning, when the backdrop came down, the wire would tighten, and...
Holmes: The killer wanted drama. Attention. Spectacle.
Watson: Yeah, but the kill itself was pretty simple, a single slice to the carotid artery with a thin, sharp blade. The wound is shallow, so the blade was probably small.
Gregson: Like a box cutter? Follow me.

Watson: Marcus! I didn't realize you were off desk duty.
Detective Bell: Yeah, Captain pulled some strings with the commissioner. Still no gun, so I'm not allowed to fly solo. But it's a start.
Gregson: We're pretty sure this is the spot where Ms. Solange was killed. CSU found some blood drops. Sprayed the area with luminol, and the whole floor lit up.
Bell: Now, after she was dead, the killer wiped up her blood with some towels, hid them in the bottom of that trashcan. I found this wrapped in one of them.
Holmes: Well, we may well have our murder weapon.
Bell: CSU already looked it over for prints. They won't know for sure till they get it back to the lab, but they think it's been wiped clean.
Holmes: See that design etched on the handle?
Watson: It's a flower.
Holmes: That's not just a flower. That is an iris.

Lanzer: I can't believe it. I was looking everywhere for it. I figured one of the core dancers must have taken it as a souvenir.
Bell: Souvenir?
Lanzer: It's happened before. They take things to remember me by. Or to show their friends.
Holmes: Please forgive my colleagues, Ms. Lanzer. They don't follow the ballet. They don't know that meeting Iris Lanzer means they are in the presence of a master.
Lanzer: Hmm.
Holmes: I myself had the pleasure of seeing your Jeu de Cartes in London. It was inspired.
Lanzer: Thank you.
Bell: Ms. Lanzer, I have to ask. Why do you have a personalized box cutter?
Holmes: Every ballerina has their own set of tools for preparing their shoes to their own specifications. Box cutters are used for trimming the soles.
Gregson: When was the last time you saw your box cutter?
Lanzer: Last week. I've been using a spare ever since.
Watson: Would you say that you and Nell were rivals?
Lanzer: No, not at all. Nell was unformed as a dancer.
Watson: Vince Renatto didn't seem to think so. He told us that he wanted her to dance the lead in this piece.
Lanzer: He flirted with the notion of Nell, but he chose me.
Holmes: We will need to know your whereabouts last night.
Lanzer: Do you think I...I left the theater at 7:00. I went home. I was there all night. My housekeeper's a live-in. She can vouch for me.
Holmes: Can you think of anyone else who may have meant Ms. Solange harm?
Lanzer: I heard a rumor that she broke up with her boyfriend, Nicholas Orman. He used to be a dancer with the company. I seem to recall he had a temper.
Holmes: Thank you very much, Ms. Lanzer. We shall speak with him. And again, a great honor to meet you.

Gregson: Come on. Marcus, you take McAndrews and pay a visit to the ex-boyfriend. I'll put Ellis and Parker on confirming Ms. Lanzer's alibi, all right?
Bell: Okay.
Holmes: Would you consider a little company, Detective?
Bell: The more, the merrier. Wait here. I got to find McAndrews.
Watson: You know you went a little, uh, fanboy back there, right?
Holmes: "Fanboy"?
Watson: I don't think I've ever seen you treat a suspect so politely.
Holmes: I don't believe she is a suspect.
Watson: Explain that.
Holmes: You suggested she has motive to kill Ms. Solange because she felt threatened, but I don't believe a talent as immense as Ms. Lanzer is capable of viewing another dancer as a threat. It would be like me wanting to kill the world's second greatest detective. Besides, she has an alibi.
Watson: According to her. Iris Lanzer may be an amazing dancer, but the Internet says she's not a very nice person. She has a lousy reputation, and last year, she ended up in court for pushing down a photographer and smashing his camera.
Holmes: Damning evidence, indeed, if the charge was that she was a diva. She is. That doesn't make her a murderer.
Watson: Excuse me.
Watson (phone): Hey, Bill. What hospital is he in? Okay, yeah. I'll be there as soon as I can.
Holmes: Problem?
Watson: Haven for the Homeless, that charity that I work for, um one of the clients went off his meds and got into some altercation with a couple of cops.
Holmes: Go. I shall endeavor to keep my fandom in check without you.

Officer Jaffin: I.D. says his name is Morris Gilroy. He was standing outside a bodega screaming at anyone who walked by. Said he was looking for his pal, "Freebo."
Officer Conroy: We asked to move along, but he only got more worked up. And then finally he took a swing at me, and then we had to wrestle him down. He said his arm was hurt, so we brought him here.
Watson: Well, Mr. Gilroy is in the system with the Department of Homeless Services. I mean, he's schizophrenic but with no history of aggression or violence.
Conroy: Oh, lucky me. He made an exception.
Watson: Well, obviously, he's off his meds.
Conroy: Yeah, you think?
Watson: You said he was looking for someone named "Freebo"?
Conroy: His pink elephant, if I had to guess.
Watson: I told you, he's not drunk. He's...
Conroy: A nutbar. Yeah, we got that.
Morris Gilroy: Freebo's gone. The sergeant. They took him. They hit him and they took him.
Watson: Were you able to get any more information about this Freebo?
Jaffin: Uh, Ms. Watson, I already told you we're not gonna collar him. But that's a professional courtesy.
Conroy: If you're thinking we're gonna go out looking for his imaginary friend...
Gilroy: They took him! Do you hear me?! They took Freebo!
Watson: Morris, I'm Joan. I know you're worried about your friend.
Gilroy: They took him, and I got to find him.
Watson: Who took him? Who? Morris, I want to help you, but you need to calm down. Okay, I need you to calm down. Okay?
Gilroy: You'll find him? You'll find Freebo?
Watson: I will do my best. I promise.

Bell: Where exactly do you work, Mr. Orman?
Nicholas Orman: I'm a dancer at, uh, Jerzey Boyz. It's a club over in Newark. When I quit ballet, I needed the money. Especially after Nell moved out.
Holmes: She ended the relationship?
Orman: She said she needed some space. What a crock. She took up with another guy.
Bell: Why do you say that?
Orman: She was preoccupied. Always busy, always running off. She wouldn't tell me the guy's name, no matter how many times I asked. Eventually, she uh, threatened me with a restraining order. Said that she'd talked to a lawyer.
Holmes: Hard to imagine how she resisted your charms.
Orman: You know what I think? I think that maybe this new guy's the one that killed her. Maybe she uh, cheated on him, too.
Holmes: Another possibility, You never got over her rejection and you murdered her.
Orman: Nell was killed last night, right? Last night, I worked. I was a big hit with the generous ladies of Newark. Some of these bills have phone numbers on them. Feel free to call 'em up and check.

Holmes (phone): Nicholas Orman has a rock-solid alibi. His manager confirmed he was at work from 8:30 to midnight.
Gregson (phone): Then he's doing better than Iris Lanzer. It turns out she lied to us this morning. Her housekeeper was off last night. She's on her way to the station, with her lawyer.

Nolan Sharp: We have been over this. My client made an honest mistake. Her housekeeper recently changed her night off, and Ms. Lanzer simply forgot.
Lanzer: I went right to my room when I got home. I turned in shortly thereafter.
Bell: Do you usually go to bed that early?
Lanzer: Before a dress rehearsal, yes. I need to be at my best. If I was gonna kill Nell, I would've done it on another night.
Nolan: Of course, my client is joking.
Holmes: Ms. Lanzer, do you know the name of the man that Nell started seeing after she broke up with Nicholas Orman? I've reached out to several members of the company. No one seems to know who he is.
Lanzer: Nell and I weren't close but to the best of my knowledge, she wasn't seeing anyone. And if Nicholas told you otherwise, he's probably trying to deflect suspicion.
Gregson: Uh, Mr. Orman has an alibi for the time of the murder, unlike you. Not to mention the fact that it was your box cutter that was used as the murder weapon.
Lanzer: I told you, someone must have taken it from my dressing room. I thought you said this wasn't going to take more than an hour.
Bell: You have somewhere to be, Ms. Lanzer?
Lanzer: As a matter of fact, I need to get to the airport.
Gregson: Uh, excuse me?
Lanzer: Oh, I'm catching a flight to Montreal for a master class I'm teaching tomorrow. It's been on my schedule for weeks.
Gregson: Actually, I'd rather that you didn't leave the city.
Sharp: I'm sorry. Is my client a suspect?
Gregson: I didn't say that. But I'm not ready to clear her, either. And since we are in the middle of a murder investigation, some flexibility on her part would be appreciated.
Lanzer: This is ridiculous. If you need me, I'll be in Montreal.
Gregson: Ms. Lanzer, I'm gonna give you one last chance to reconsider.
Lanzer: I'm gonna give you one last chance to leave me alone. I did not hurt Nell. And if you keep implying that I did, I will sue you.
Gregson: Detective. Iris Lanzer.
Lanzer: Don't touch me.
Gregson: You are under arrest for the murder of Nell Solange.
Sharp: Iris, I'll have you out in a few hours. Don't worry.
Holmes: I would be remiss if I didn't say I had my doubts about Ms. Lanzer's guilt.
Gregson: Yeah? Well, she didn't give me much choice, did she?

Watson: Hey.
Bell: Hey. You missed some excitement this afternoon.
Watson: Yeah, I got a call from Sherlock 20 minutes after I heard about it on the news.
Bell: Captain's been getting calls from the tabloids all day. Obviously they think one beautiful woman cutting another in half is gonna move some papers tomorrow.
Watson: Mmm. Where's Iris now? Home.
Bell: She made bail, but at least she can't leave the country. So, I got your message. You're trying to track down a homeless guy who may not exist?
Watson: He exists. Army Sergeant Zeke Frebeaux. Or, as his friend likes to call him, Freebo. I found his picture at one of the shelters. His jacket caught my eye. It's an official Army-issued fleece. I was hoping you could help me distribute that to uh, hospitals, radio cars.
Bell: Yeah, yeah. Send me the file, all right? Okay.

Watson: Good morning. Would you like some coffee?
Lanzer: Uh, actually, I'd prefer cappuccino. Do you have a machine?

Watson: You seriously slept with Iris last night?
Holmes: It does evoke a certain frisson, doesn't it? Mind you, it's the art I find alluring, not the fame.
Watson: Okay, she is a murder suspect. In our case. If anyone finds out...
Holmes: I'm feeling a little judged again, Watson.
Watson: It's probably because I am judging you.
Holmes: I was very discreet. As was Iris. Whom, I might add, instigated the whole thing. She found me after she made bail and she stated her intentions quite boldly. I sensed she wanted to learn more about the investigation. So, deciding that turnabout was more than fair play, I thought I would take the opportunity to learn more about her.
Watson: Wait, you, you are claiming that you had sex with her to advance the case?
Holmes: That was the primary purpose, yes. Yesterday, at the station, I noticed a certain stiffness in her right shoulder. She then cried out in pain when Detective Bell attempted to move her by the same arm. This led me to suspect a tear in her rotator cuff. It's an all-too-common injury in ballet, and one that hasn't yet interfered with her dancing. It would make it impossible for her to operate the pulley which was used to move Ms. Solange's body, even with the counterweights.
Watson: You know you could have just asked her if she had a problem with her shoulder.
Holmes: Actually, I couldn't, 'cause it's not uncommon for older dancers to lie about injuries. So last night, I paid particular attention to her range of movement, her avoidance of certain positions...
Watson: Just cut to the chase.
Holmes: My verdict, a small but significant tear in her right rotator cuff. I am now quite convinced that my initial instincts about her innocence were correct. Sleep with her yourself, if you don't believe me.
Watson: Oh, that's a great solution.
Lanzer: Sherlock, Nolan is expecting you. He'll give you full access to my legal files.
Watson: Who is uh, um, Nolan?
Holmes: Her attorney. He handled the pushing case against the photographer eight months ago and he's issued several restraining orders against obsessive fans over the years.
Watson: You think one of them is trying to frame Iris?
Holmes: Join me at Nolan's office to peruse his files and help me find out.
Watson: I can't. I have to go to Queens.
Holmes: Pursuing another development in Hobo Hunt 2014?
Watson: I got a hit off of Frebeaux's photo that Marcus posted. Someone saw him arguing with their neighbor the other week.
Holmes: Are you sure that tracking Mr. Frebeaux warrants your time? I do have some experience with street people and it's not uncommon for them to drop off the grid and then reemerge on their own.
Watson: His friend asked me to help.

Sharp (phone): Iris Lanzer is an innocent woman who's being railroaded by the NYPD. A trial will bear that out.
Newspaper Reporter (phone): I understand that, but...
Sharp (phone): You got that?
Newspaper Reporter (phone): Yeah, got it.
Sharp (phone): Front page, above the fold.
Newspaper Reporter (phone): Okay.
Sharp (phone): Thank you.
Sharp: Mr. Holmes, good to see you again. Glad to know someone in the department is not pre-judging my client.
Holmes: Hmm. Huh. How do you like the, uh the old Commodore, hmm? Your automatic door closer. I believe that is uh, Exeter's Commodore model. Yeah, I recognize the um...
Sharp: Quite the ear for detail. No wonder the police keep you around.
Holmes: Yes, well. So, I take it these are the files which pertain to cases you've handled for Iris, right?
Sharp: As I'm sure you've figured out by now, she is a very complicated person.
Holmes: But her money is no less green, right?
Sharp: Well, you should see how many hours I haven't billed her for. I don't represent Iris for the money. I do it because I admire her.
Holmes: Well, she is a remarkable dancer.
Sharp: Oh, it's not just that. It's, it's her single-mindedness. She's completely committed to her craft. I respect that. I think I've learned a thing or two.
Holmes: So if I could get some help just getting these to a taxi.
Sharp: Uh, respectfully, I'd rather they not leave the firm. You're more than welcome to go over them here. I have to leave for back-to-back interviews about the case.
Holmes: I, I may require some time.
Sharp: Take all the time you need. Any credible suspect you find will make both of our lives easier. Also, because you may not hear it from Iris, thanks.

Watson: Rachel Brown?
Rachel Brown: Yes?
Watson: I'm Joan Watson. I'm looking for a man named Zeke Frebeaux. Apparently one of your neighbors saw you arguing with him a couple weeks ago. Does he look familiar to you?
Rachel: Of course he does. He's my brother. Sorry about the mess.
Watson: How long has your brother been living on the streets?
Rachel: On and off for about three years. Since he got back from Afghanistan. He was diagnosed with severe PTSD. And there were problems with drugs. I try to track him down every month or so. Two weeks ago, I found him camping out at Gantry Plaza. I was able to get him to come back here. For a good meal. New clothes. I begged him to stay, but he didn't want to. We uh, had a fight outside, and that's probably what the neighbor saw.
Watson: Do you have any idea where he might be now?
Rachel: He said something about the shelter at St. Ignatius.
Watson: I checked there. They haven't seen him.
Rachel: It's so cold.
Watson: You couldn't have made him stay. Here or at a shelter. He, he's an adult. He made a choice. If something's happened to him, it's not your fault. Well, I should get going. If I get a lead on your brother, I will let you know.
Rachel: You're, you're still gonna look for him?
Watson: Of course.
Rachel: I, I'm sorry. It just means a lot that someone else is looking out for him.

Holmes: After reviewing Sharp's files, none of the fans Iris issued restraining orders against struck me as viable suspects. One of them died, one's battling cancer, one of them now herds sheep in the Netherlands.
Watson: But obviously, someone who lives in this building has potential.
Holmes: Jake Picardo is the paparazzo who took Iris to court for pushing him and breaking his camera. He now resides in apartment 10-D. I know you followed a lead on the missing Mr. Frebeaux, but did you have to follow it into an ashtray? You reek of smoke.
Watson: Someone at the house I went to was a smoker.
Holmes: Someone at the house you went to was a chimney.
Watson: Mmm.
Holmes: And they smoke Double T's. That is the cheapest and most chemical-laden brand on the market.
Watson: Hmm.
Holmes: Still haven't read my monographs on tobacco, I see.
Watson: Back to Jake Picardo...
Holmes: Iris recently renewed her restraining order against him.
Watson: Why?
Holmes: Because she believed he had started following her again.

Jake Picardo: Iris Lanzer. Yeah, she's having a rough week, isn't she?
Holmes: A fact which seems to give you great satisfaction.
Picardo: What do you expect? Bitch ruined my life.
Watson: 'Cause she broke your camera?
Picardo: Which she refused to pay for. And then I take her to court, her lawyer says I dropped my camera 'cause I was high. And then he introduces all this testimony about how I had this huge coke problem. Next thing I know, my agency dropped me.
Watson: A paparazzi agency fired you over drug use?
Picardo: My boss was on some clean-living kick at the time. Of course, six months later, he's in rehab for oxy. But ever since that trial, all I get are freelance gigs, which means I gotta pop for every tip, every new piece of equipment...which reminds me, what do you think of my new spy camera? 'Cause it's uh, pretty fond of you, huh?
Watson: I'm beginning to think that you like it when women smash your cameras.
Holmes: Small wonder you're so pleased with Iris's current situation. It must seem like karmic retribution. The question is, are you the kind of man who makes your own karma? Where were you two nights ago?
Picardo: Tuesday. Uh, I was holed up in my van, waiting for one of those dumb kids from the vampire movies to show at a club. He never did.
Watson: Can you confirm that?
Picardo: No. Why would I need to?
Holmes: We're exploring the possibility that someone other than Iris Lanzer killed Nell Solange.
Picardo: She's really got you snowed. I mean, if you knew even half of the manipulative crap she's into...
Watson: What kind of manipulative crap are you talking about? And how would you know about that? Was Iris right? Have you been following her?
Picardo: This has been fun, but I'd like you to leave. I got work to do and...
Holmes: It's Detective Bell. He would like us back at the precinct right away. I have a feeling we'll be seeing you again.

Bell: Couple hours ago, a reporter at The Ledger received an unmarked envelope containing this thumb drive. Now, there's a voice mail on it that was left by Iris Lanzer for Nell Solange.
Lanzer (recording): Nell, it's me. Look, stop behaving like a hysterical little girl and answer your phone. Did you really think you were the first dancer I'd been with? Get this straight, you're not walking away from me, not without consequences.
Holmes: Now we know why we couldn't find the new man in Nell's life.
Watson: Because it wasn't a man at all, it was Iris.

Holmes: You and Nell were having an affair.
Lanzer: Yes, but I didn't kill her.
Watson: Well, it certainly seemed like you were ready to in that voice mail.
Lanzer: Well, I have a temper, shouldn't be news to anyone.
Holmes: So, when did your romance with Nell begin?
Lanzer: A few months ago, before we started work on the production.
Holmes: She broke off her relationship with Nicholas Orman to be with you. She must have been quite smitten.
Lanzer: She was. But my interest in her was a bit more practical.
Watson: You were threatened by her. You thought she might get the lead, so you seduced her and then convinced her to step aside.
Lanzer: Well, it worked. Just like it has before. That was the problem, actually. Nell had run into one of my previous flings. She told Nell that I'd done the same thing to her, and that's when Nell called and ended it.
Watson: But if you were just using her, why leave such an angry message? I mean, you already had the lead.
Holmes: You'd actually begun to care for her.
Lanzer: My whole life, I've loved the ballet. No person has ever compared. The idea that I might give a role to anyone I can't imagine. But with Nell I finally started to see why someone might. The day after I left the message, I apologized to her, and she deleted it right in front of me.
Sharp: Well, then how did it end up in that reporter's hands?
Holmes: The other night, you gave me your phone um, to take some commemorative pictures. I, I remember it was quite hot to the touch, the phone.
Lanzer: It's been that way for quite a while.
Holmes: Could I see it? Does the battery drain quite quickly?
Lanzer: Yeah. I figured it was just getting old. Why?
Holmes: Unusual heat is an indicator of spyware. Yes, I think your phone may have been cloned. And I have a fairly good idea who's responsible.

Bell: So, Computer Crime Lab found spyware on Iris Lanzer's phone, just like you said. Now, he denied having anything to do with it at first. Then we explained that the phone's signals were being transmitted back to his home IP address. That's when he lawyered up.
Watson: All of this over a broken camera.
Bell: That's our cue.

Picardo: You got me, okay? I cloned Iris's phone, and yeah, that's how I knew they were together. But I didn't leak that voice mail to the press, and I didn't kill Nell.
Holmes: He does understand he's not helping himself, doesn't he?
Picardo: Well, I can prove it.
Picardo's Lawyer: My client would like to make a statement as to his whereabouts on the night of Ms. Solange's death. But for the moment, he pleads the Fifth. In the interest of aiding the police's investigation, he'll waive that right, provided the district attorney extends full immunity on all charges.
Bell: Before I can bring this to the D.A., I'm gonna need some sense of what he was up to.
Picardo: I was going to shoot a porno in Nell Solange's apartment with a bunch of hidden video cameras. I wanted to catch her and Iris in the act. I was gonna sell it to the highest bidder, two smoking-hot dancers, one of whom was Iris Lanzer. I could've named my price.
Holmes: I don't suppose you have any way of verifying this?
Picardo: I set up three cameras in Nell's bedroom, one in the shower. Pull 'em. You'll see I was there most of the night.

Holmes: The police checked Picardo's cameras. The footage confirmed his alibi.
Watson: Okay, so he didn't kill Nell. He still could have been the one that leaked that voice mail to the press.
Holmes: It's unlikely that he would lie about that given the nature of the other things that he confessed to. I'm still of the opinion that Iris is being framed. Which makes the killer the most likely leaker of the message, and so I've commenced scrubbing of the voice mail. Upon closer examination, I realized there were two levels of ambient noise, which suggests it's a recording of a recording. The first level captures the noise around Iris when she left the message, the second captures the noises in the vicinity of the person who recorded it again. If I had to guess, I would say they had physical access to Nell's phone. It would've been a simple case of putting hers on speaker, theirs on record. What are you doing with that coat?
Watson: Well, the guy that I visited yesterday in the hospital, Morris Gilroy, he was released this afternoon. He's staying at St. Ignatius shelter.
Holmes: That's not an answer.
Watson: Well, he's on his meds now, so he should be clearer. I was going to go to the shelter and see if he could tell me a little more about Zeke Frebeaux. And while I was there, I was gonna donate some clothes. So, can I take the coat?
Watson: So, why are you doing this? What, donating clothes?
Holmes: Eh, helping this man. Trying to find his friend. I've intruded. Sorry.
Watson: No, it's it's okay. It's, it shouldn't be a secret. Especially from you. My father is uh, he's schizophrenic. And homeless.
Holmes: Your father lives in Scarsdale and he's an author.
Watson: No, that is my stepfather. My mother married him when I was three. Uh, we all took his name. I, I'm talking about my birth father. My mother was pregnant with me when when he got sick. I mean, she did her best, but you know, it was a lot. They got divorced a few months after I was born. He was in and out of institutions for a while, but for the last 15 years, he's been on the streets mostly.
Holmes: Where?
Watson: Here in New York.
Holmes: Do you see him? Well, that's why I volunteer. Sometimes he recognizes me. Sometimes he doesn't, just depends on if he's on his meds. I tried to get him into a halfway house or a treatment program, but, you know, he says he doesn't want it, doesn't need it. It wasn't easy, but I realized that I just had to accept it. I don't try to talk him into it anymore.
Holmes: When was the last time you saw him?
Watson: It's been almost two years.
Holmes: Mmm. Program's done.
Watson: All right. Let me know how it goes.
Lanzer (recording): Nell, it's me. Look, stop behaving like a hysterical little girl and answer your phone. Nell, it's me. Look, stop behaving like a hysterical little girl and answer your phone.

Gilroy: I'm sorry about the other day. All the yelling and screaming.
Watson: It's okay. You were having an episode, that's normal.
Gilroy: I know.
Watson: What about when Zeke was taken, were you lucid then?
Gilroy: It was late. I was maybe a block away. Saw some guy roughing him up. Forced him into a van.
Watson: Can you describe him?
Gilroy: White. I think. You said you already checked for Zeke at the 23rd Street Shelter?
Watson: Yeah, he hasn't been there. His sister hasn't seen him, either.
Gilroy: I don't know how much longer I can hold on to his stuff for him.
Watson: That's his bag? Can I take a look? Thanks. Double T.
Gilroy: All he ever smoked. His folks. Thought you'd recognize her.
Watson: No.
Gilroy: His sister.
Watson: Does he have more than one?

Sharp: Mr. Holmes. My assistant told me you came to visit. Comfy?
Watson: I know that you're the one who recorded Iris's voice mail.
Sharp: Excuse me?
Watson: I also know that you recorded it here.
Sharp: What the hell are you talking about?
Watson: That noise. The distinctive noise of your trusty door closer. It makes a guest appearance on the recording's second layer of ambient noise. Its appearance confounded me until I remembered that Nell had threatened her ex with a restraining order. That she'd gone as far as to consult a lawyer. You.
Sharp: Well, Iris was kind enough to refer me. Nell and I met a couple of times. That's no secret. Ultimately, she decided not to follow through.
Watson: But she did decide to ask for your help with her when things grew messy between them. A complicated situation for you 'cause Iris was also your client. I submit that you recorded the meeting in order to avoid a conflict of interest. Now, armed with proof of Nell and Iris's affair, it struck you that if Nell were to die at Iris's hand, and in dramatic enough fashion, the case would become a media sensation. First step, kill Nell. Or rather, prepare to kill her. You took Iris's personalized box cutter, you went to the theater the night before the dress rehearsal, and you slit Nell's throat, and then you prepared her for her grand entrance. Leaking Iris's voice mail would demonstrate her motive and the true nature of their relationship.
Sharp: My office is not the only one with that door closer. There must be hundreds, thousands around the city. So, while that's a good story, you don't have any real proof.
Watson: Well, I would say that I had Iris. But I can't seem to reach her on her cell phone.
Sharp: She had a new one to replace the one that was cloned.
Watson: And I imagine you're the only one with the number.
Sharp: As far as where she is, we agree she should keep a low profile for now, so I set her up someplace private.
Watson: She'll have to come to court eventually.
Sharp: Well, by that time, I will have convinced her that you turned against us. You're just trying to trick her into incriminating herself.
Watson: I would remind you that the only attorneys who benefit from cases of this magnitude are ones who have emerged victoriously. I studied your work, Mr. Sharp. You're a mediocre barrister at best. I fear you may have stacked the odds against your client too high.
Sharp: Iris Lanzer isn't going to jail. I promise you that. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work to do.

Watson: Rachel, we're here for Zeke.
Rachel: He isn't here.
Watson: That's funny, because you and your house reek of his brand of cigarettes, Double T's. I saw you throw an empty pack away the other day.
Cliff Brown: Uh, they were mine, actually. Trying to quit. Can we help you?
Rachel: This is my husband Cliff. Cliff, this is the woman who's helping to look for my brother.
Watson: Zeke Frebaux is not your brother. But that hasn't stopped you from cashing his veteran's benefit checks, has it?
Cliff: Rachel told you Zeke isn't here.
Watson: Well, this search warrant says that we don't have to take your word for it. A padlocked door inside your house? You want to tell me what, or who, you've got down there?

Watson: There were three homeless men altogether. One of them was on disability, the other two were vets. That woman and her husband had them chained in their basement, collecting their benefits.
Holmes: Mr. Frebeaux's condition?
Watson: All things considered, good. I spoke to his parents. They're hoping they can convince him to come home this time.
Holmes: And if they can't?
Watson: Well, it has to be up to him.
Holmes: You should be proud of yourself, Watson. If only the wheels of justice would turn as smoothly in the case of Nolan Sharp.
Watson: Well, he can't keep Iris hidden forever. We'll find her. We'll explain.
Holmes: Oh, say we did. Won't prove anything. And while it would be greatly satisfying to see her fire him, if might decrease her chances of being exonerated.
Watson: Well, she's being represented by the same man who framed her.
Holmes: And as the actual murderer, he can use his intimate knowledge of the crime to craft a defense which is far superior to that of a far less homicidal attorney. Hmm. You should have seen him. How utterly confident he was. I'm sure he has some ace in the hole, some piece of evidence that he's holding back, something he's going to use to exculpate Iris.
Watson: Like what?
Holmes: I don't know. Perhaps he took a photograph of himself as he slashed Nell Solange's throat.
Watson: Oh.
Holmes: Perhaps he smiled and winked at the camera as he gave a big thumbs-up.
Watson: What?
Holmes: While I doubt that they depict a smiling, thumb-raising Nolan Sharp, there were pictures taken of him that night. And I think he's going to use them to exonerate Iris.

Sharp: Iris Lanzer is an innocent woman who the D.A. has made the target of a witch hunt.
Holmes: Yeah, savor the moment, Mr. Sharp. From now on, the only person you'll be defending is yourself.
Sharp: Ugh! Mr. Holmes, is this going to take long? Because I'm due to address the media on the courthouse steps.
Holmes: What do you think, Captain? Is this going to take a long time?
Gregson: I'm thinking 25 to life.
Holmes: You mentioned the other day that you often undercharged Iris for your hours. Her records supported that.
Sharp: It's not a crime to give a friend a break.
Bell: It is if you bill other clients for that time.
Holmes: Given the perfectly adequate success of your practice, it seemed you must be making up the difference elsewhere. It wasn't much. It was just a hunch, really, but sometimes, with the right judge, a hunch is all you need. We procured a search warrant to search your offices this morning.
Gregson: We found this in your safe.
Holmes: I recalled last night that Nell Solange's killer stole the hard drive which collected the various security feeds at the theater. I assumed at the time he'd destroyed it 'cause he wanted to protect his identity, but that was before I realized that you and he were one and the same.
Bell: We've already reviewed the footage. Iris Lanzer isn't on there. Just some guy in a mask. Funny thing is, he's about your height and weight.
Holmes: I'm curious, Mr. Sharp. Was the footage a fail-safe? A grenade to be unpinned at trial, if and only if, your talents as an attorney were insufficient to clear Iris's good name? Or was their appearance as inevitable as your yen for the spotlight is pathetic?
Gregson: We've dropped all charges against Ms. Lanzer, and we're placing you under arrest for the murder of Nell Solange.
Holmes: Don't worry about the reporters outside. You look great.

Lanzer (TV): As uh, relieved as I am that the charges were dropped, my heart breaks for Nell Solange. She was very special to me and I will truly miss her. Aside from being an excellent dancer, as a person, she was...
Watson: What are those?
Holmes: Blankets. Extra blankets, to be precise. I saw them in a closet, and I realized I haven't needed them of late. Not with all the hot-blooded company I've been enjoying. So, I thought we might take them to the park and see if anyone was in need. I understand it's going to be quite cold tonight.
Watson: I'll get my coat.

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